Unfortunate Cookies - Shawn Dougan

Life of Shawn Dougan Stories

Here I am!

My birth was turbulent to say the least.

I was born at Hollywood Presbyterian Hospital in Hollywood, California on September 2, 1967.

When I was born, the umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck and I came out purple and gasping for air, I nearly died! That would be unfortunate considering the fact that if I had never been born you would not be reading this right now and wouldn't that be a big disappointment? (haha!).

Anyway,after coming into this world with a limited amount of oxygen the doctor decided to call my Father into the other room and explain things to him. The doctor said, "Mr. Dougan,because of the fact that your baby Son had a limited amount of oxygen when he was born due to the fact that the cord was wrapped around his neck I cannot tell whether or not there will be permanent brain damage."...

And well, here I AM! (true story, no lie). 

Hello Again!

Hey it's been quite some time since I've been on here, I think I'll start blogging for real...soon...I have a lot to share.




I have been giving my website a major facelift recently and I've been adding more artists, actors, and musicians and so on so that I can establish a prescence on the web.
Global Arts Awareness



Also, I now own four domain names which are up for sale on sedo.com. Wish me luck!



Go to my home page to check things out when you have time.

Trapped Chilean Miners.wmv

Some dumb jokes/riddles I made up.

Dumb jokes I made up: Yes I wrote these. They are incredibly stupid, you've been warned...

What do you call coffee with a laxative?

A Crappacino!


What did the sheep use to eat her dinner?

EWE tensils!


What do you call a dancer that has IBS?

A Bowlerina!


What kind of diapers do Rap Stars buy their babies?

Thuggies! (word)

Vote for me!

Not sure which way to turn in the upcoming election?
No "good" choices out there?

Vote for me and I promise:
To fill your homes with spastic and sarcastic wierdness.
Make you laugh until you wet your pants.
Supply free Depends for the entire Nation in reference to the above comment.
Peek in your windows while you sleep. (I'm only kidding).
Make fun of people when they do stupid things.
Make myself a complete annoying neusance.
Make fun of myself.
Continue with my agenda of World Domination.
Stop leaving skid-marks in my underwear. (yeah right, all men do that no matter what we say).
Never lie to you unless it benefits me.
Have pork skins and Diet Dr. Pepper for lunch for an entire year.
Cure the common cold.
Cure cancer.
Stop farting. (again, yeah right...)
Run amock on the streets of America on drunken binges spewing forth profanity and ridiculous rantings.

WOW! Spoken like a true Irish Politician!

Shawn Dougan

Please click the link below for more:

http://www.tsgnet.com/pres.php?id=46832&altf=Tibxo&altl=Epvhbo

Me

Ok I'm now talking.
Welcome to my blog, a place of random weirdness where you can feel free to be yourself.

I have a question:
Why is there braille at the DRIVE THROUGH ATM? That scares the hell out of me...